2 addicts dating
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly. You should upgrade or use an alternative browser. Discussion in ' Opiate addiction ' started by msmogadonFeb 5, Log in or Sign up. We serve over 4 million readers per month, and have costs like all popular websites: To protect our independence we do not run ads. We take no government funds. If Drugs-Forum is useful to 2 addicts dating, take one minute to keep it online another year by donating whatever you can today.
Donations are currently not sufficient to pay our bills and keep the site up. Your help is most welcome. Can 2 addicts in a relationship ever get clean together? Jul 23, Messages: SWIM has 2 addicts dating with her fiancee now for 4 years. She loves him very much and can't imagine living without him. They are both addicted to heroin. SWIM wants to get clean very much 2 addicts dating has so far been unsuccessful in her feable attempts to kick the monkey.
SWIM's partner works away and will get clean while away only to relapse immediately on his return. SWIM will stop using heroin while he is away and switch on to methadone mls daily. SWIM will also relapse on his return. It is inevitable that this happens as SWIM has to help him as he won't do it for himself which leads to SWIM doing it too. SWIM asked me to ask the smart folks on the drugs forum if any of them know of any couples that have successfully managed to kick it and stay together.
SWIM wants to know what is the secret of their success. Can it ever work out? MarkyMayhemFeb 5, Oct 20, Messages: But in my observation, both need to want to get clean, and apply themselves at the same time, or it's hopeless. Mar 9, Messages: They ended up marrying and both are now very successfull with two children. On the other hand, swim met a girl in 2 addicts dating and it led to 2 years of terrible relapse.
Swim will see how things pan out however, he has been clean for a little while and his girl friend just started up on methadone. Will keep you posted! Jul 3, Messages: It would be hard but not imposible Swim's relationships usually break up due to his drug using. Just have to make a start date together. Good luck to the both of you!! DickonFeb 5, Oct 17, Messages: Moggster, nice to see you 2 addicts dating again.
I am going to go all Zen on you and say you should "care without caring", or at least try to. I'm not sure how well versed you are on codependence. I've always been a bit sneery at psychobabble, and codependence is definitely veering towards an over-therapeutic 2 addicts dating. That said, it is useful way of looking at what often goes wrong in 2 addicts dating, where you lose your sense of self in the "significant other" yep - I'm going full-on 2 addicts dating therapy-speak!
If the other person is doing the same thing, then you end up with two snakes biting each others tails. There is no external input and the relationship spirals inwards and implodes. This somewhat graphic metaphor is 2 addicts dating in most cases using-relationships fail to work. The addictive personality is likely to get too caught up in the other person, and substitute the addiction to the substance for an addiction to or codependence with the partner.
So, what can you do to make such a relationship work. My number one piece of advice would be to limit contact: There needs to be a significant amount of "looking outwards" to avoids the snakes-biting-each-others-tails problem. As far as I know beena from on here is trying to do just this, 2 addicts dating when I last read although this was some time ago she and her partner were doing ok. The real problem is being in a situation where if 2 addicts dating partner used, so would you.
This is the care without caring part. It's not that you don't care, it's that you don't manifest such care by putting yourself out. This is codenpendence, and any real love in a relationship must start from self-love. If you love yourself, and you've got clean, you'll not relapse if the partner does. Neither can you blame your partner, you must take responsibility for yourself.
Usually it is far easier for people to learn responsibility, and self-love outside of a relationship. You will need to feel whole as a single person before you can ever have a successful relationship. Distinguish true love from needy fear of abandonment, loss of self-esteem etc. If the relationship is strong it will endure you both spending some time apart. But remember people can be addictive, but love is not about clinginess and neediness.
Love is also about saying no to your partner when you need to, and asserting your autonomy. Care without caring i. Don't take what I say too seriously, it's just a view, and I'm no Freud! Dec 3, Messages: My friend Dave thinks that getting and staying clean is 2 addicts dating very personal choice. Swim cannot base her personal situation and sobriety 2 addicts dating another to be successful. It sounds like when apart swim and 2 addicts dating have had success,then when back together revert to old ingrained habits.
So as Drd has mentioned some time apart could be beneficial to both parties. Dave has known several couples who have tried to quit together without success,but after going their separate ways have been successful,THEN resumed their relationship.: Good luck good thoughts. EyesOfTheWorldFeb 5, Oct 6, Messages: SWIM 2 addicts dating assuming you live with your fiance and neither of you really has anywhere else to go for a "separation period" while you each get clean.
SWIM has not tried to quit drugs, he loves them, they love him back etc, but he has seen other people do it successfully, some of them couples. Delete all dealer's 's from cell phones, datebooks and memory Get rid of any remaining drugs, either by "one last hurrah" or by throwing them down the toilet. Suffering through wd is actually easier when you have a companion that is suffering too and knows what you are going through, rather than a judgemental person, or alone, or with someone where you have to pretend to have the flu.